Down The Rabbit Hole

I failed to post yesterday, thereby ruining my ten day posting streak. Oh well, I’ll just post twice today I guess.

Yesterday I went with my friend Kristen to visit our friends Natalie and Steven, who just had a baby. His name is Alexander and he is so sweet. Newborn babies just kill me. Everything about them is so small and perfect - perfect little nose, perfect teeny little eyelashes, the little feet and toes. AAAHH! I could just eat him up.

Kristen said that she was surprised that I had wanted to go with her to see him, since my miscarriage is still so fresh. But I love seeing my friends have babies, and I am thrilled for Nat and Steven, who are just great people. It makes me feel good to see them so happy and in awe of their little boy. It makes me look forward to the day that I get to do that. Plus, it makes for good baby-holding time. And then I get to hand him back and not have to change any diapers
Then we went over to Michael and Christine’s house to spend the evening with them, and Cormac (their son) was just being the biggest cuddlebunny. We’ve known him since the day he was born, and he loves us. It’s so cool to walk into their house and have his face light up when he sees us. Last night he kept crawling over to me and holding his arms out for me to pick him up. I would hold him on my lap, flip him backward onto my legs and kiss his neck while he giggled. And when Michael brought Cormac out in his jammies before bedtime (the kind with feet - I almost died from the cuteness), we kissed him goodnight, and he held out his arms to me again to be held. Too sweet.

It’s love like that that makes me so excited to have my own baby. It’s just so pure and simple. Christine was saying last night, as she gazed at Cormac snoozing in his car seat on the way home from dinner, that she wishes that somebody could figure out how to bottle the emotion that she feels when she looks at him, because it would make a million dollars, it’s that good. I can’t wait for my chance to feel that way too.